Have you ever taken an escalator? You start at the bottom and without paying attention to what’s actually going on, you move up and up.
It’s the same thing when it comes to escalating conflict.
Escalation within a couple’s conflict happens when each partner communicates in a way that leads to harsher comments, more intense emotions, and the volume going upwards, figuratively and literally.… Continue reading Here
Creating emotionally committed relationships is similar to baking the most delicious muffins.
This weekend, I attempted to bake gluten-free muffins.
It got me thinking… if lasting love had specific ingredients, what would need to be mixed together?
What would make it delicious year after year?… Continue reading Here
Love is like a light switch.
When people fall in love, the light turns on. They typically feel excited, captivated, and eager to get to know their partners. They see each other in a positive light.
After observing thousands of different relationship conflicts, Dr. Gottman and his colleagues noticed that every relationship has two kinds of problems: solvable and unsolvable.
Solvable problems can be resolved with healthy communication, understanding, and commitment to changes. Essentially, once the problem is discussed in a mature way and an adjustment is made, the problem is no longer a problem.… Continue reading Here
“Few dating couples would get married if they had as little focused conversation as most married couples do.” – Dr. Bill Doughty, The Intentional Family
How couples talk to one another and what they discuss determines the way partners stay emotionally connected within their relationship.… Continue reading Here
Sex in a committed relationship can be bed-shaking, neighbor-waking and anxiety-freeing. If that’s true, then how come a committed relationship is when many of us stop wanting it?
It only takes one partner’s focus on an actual or anticipated sexual dysfunction to disconnect both during the act.… Continue reading Here
Love is a dance of connection and disconnection. Some of us need more connection, others need independence. What if I told you there were only two roads to making a toxic relationship healthier?
Road One is breaking up and finding a more secure partner.… Continue reading Here
Without extensive research, one might assume that both partners in a romantic relationship would have similar opinions and levels of satisfaction.
This is a myth.
Over 5 million individuals in a committed relationship have confirmed that each romantic partner has their own unique view of the marriage or relationship.… Continue reading Here