Emotional Connection

How to Find a Couples Therapist Who Can Actually Help You

couples-therapist

couples-therapist

Couples Therapy. That can be intimidating.

Practically every week, I receive emails from couples who have spent 16+ months in therapy. So I ask…

  • How has your relationship improved?
  • What skills did you learn to build a stronger friendship or manage conflict in healthy ways?
Continue reading Here

Is it Time to Go to Couples Counseling?

Is it Time to Go to Couples Counseling?

couples counseling

We are all familiar with couples counseling.

But before we get into that, let me back up a little bit.

Ongoing relationship distress is harmful to each romantic partner’s mental1 and physical well-being,2 and in addition, can negatively impact the kids.… Continue reading Here

Negative Interpretations in Romantic Relationships: When What You Think Happened Is Worse Than What Actually Happened

Negative Interpretations in Romantic Relationships: When What You Think Happened Is Worse Than What Actually Happened

interpretations

One of the most destructive patterns in romantic relationships is negative interpretations. A negative interpretation occurs when a significant other believes that the motives of their partner are more negative than they actually are.1

This toxic behavior is a silent killer of relationships.… Continue reading Here

Is a Lack of Attention Costing Your Relationship?

attention

attention

The quality and quantity of attention each romantic partner gives their relationship influences the satisfaction both partners feel in the relationship.

“One of the most important things people get is attention. Attention, interest in you…curiosity about… who are you, the stuff that couples neglect in their relationships.”

Continue reading Here

Attachment Theory Explains Why Your Relationships Fail

Attachment Theory

Attachment Theory

The beliefs you adopt in pursuing your relationships determines the type of relationships you end up with.

Why?

We are attracted to those who confirm the beliefs we hold about ourselves.

Here are some examples:

Meet Miguel. Miguel plays games, hides his true intentions, and manipulates women to stay in a relationship with him.… Continue reading Here

The Conflict Escalator: The ABCs of Escalating Conflict

escalating-conflict

escalating-conflict

Have you ever taken an escalator? You start at the bottom and without paying attention to what’s actually going on, you move up and up.

It’s the same thing when it comes to escalating conflict.

Escalation within a couple’s conflict happens when each partner communicates in a way that leads to harsher comments, more intense emotions, and the volume going upwards, figuratively and literally.… Continue reading Here