Relationship Arguments

Trust & Commitment: Why Every Happy Relationship Needs It

Trust & Commitment: Why Every Happy Relationship Needs It

Believe me when I say, a happy relationship is IMPOSSIBLE without trust and commitment. Don’t believe me? Keep reading.

Love is like Legos. In each passing moment, we are either building a wall between ourselves and our lover or a bridge into each other’s hearts.… Continue reading Here

Is it Time to Go to Couples Counseling?

Is it Time to Go to Couples Counseling?

couples counseling

We are all familiar with couples counseling.

But before we get into that, let me back up a little bit.

Ongoing relationship distress is harmful to each romantic partner’s mental1 and physical well-being,2 and in addition, can negatively impact the kids.… Continue reading Here

Negative Interpretations in Romantic Relationships: When What You Think Happened Is Worse Than What Actually Happened

Negative Interpretations in Romantic Relationships: When What You Think Happened Is Worse Than What Actually Happened

interpretations

One of the most destructive patterns in romantic relationships is negative interpretations. A negative interpretation occurs when a significant other believes that the motives of their partner are more negative than they actually are.1

This toxic behavior is a silent killer of relationships.… Continue reading Here

The Intentions vs. Impact Debate: When Partner’s Unintentionally Hurt Each Other

intentions

intentions

How do you respond when your partner questions your intentions?

Do you get angry? Defensive?

I do.

One of the big reasons we struggle with relationship conflict is due to the misunderstanding caused by the intention vs. impact battle.

In Dr.… Continue reading Here

The Conflict Escalator: The ABCs of Escalating Conflict

escalating-conflict

escalating-conflict

Have you ever taken an escalator? You start at the bottom and without paying attention to what’s actually going on, you move up and up.

It’s the same thing when it comes to escalating conflict.

Escalation within a couple’s conflict happens when each partner communicates in a way that leads to harsher comments, more intense emotions, and the volume going upwards, figuratively and literally.… Continue reading Here

Divorce Prevention: The Light Switch of Love Dilemma

Divorce Prevention: The Light Switch of Love Dilemma

divorce-prevention

Love is like a light switch.

When people fall in love, the light turns on. They typically feel excited, captivated, and eager to get to know their partners. They see each other in a positive light.

When couples divorce, the most common reason is that they “grew apart.”… Continue reading Here

How Chronic Stonewalling Imprisons a Relationship

How Chronic Stonewalling Imprisons a Relationship

stonewalling
Have you ever watched a child try to get attention from their mom or dad?

“Pay attention to me.”
“Look at me.”
“Mommy! Daddy! Watch me.”

What happens if the child’s attachment figure is unavailable and unresponsive?

The child is bound to be distressed.… Continue reading Here

Rewrite Your Money Scripts in Marriage: 7 Steps to a Wealthy Relationship

wealthy-relationship

wealthy-relationship

Couples fight about money. All. The. Time.

In fact, money is one of the top five most common causes of conflict within relationships.1

But is the fight really about dollars and cents?

Like most conflicts in relationships, money has symbolic meaning to each partner.… Continue reading Here

Relationship Conflict: 9 Signs Yours is Unsolvable and Destructive

Relationship Conflict: 9 Signs Yours is Unsolvable and Destructive

relationship-conflict

After observing thousands of different relationship conflicts, Dr. Gottman and his colleagues noticed that every relationship has two kinds of problems: solvable and unsolvable.

Solvable problems can be resolved with healthy communication, understanding, and commitment to changes. Essentially, once the problem is discussed in a mature way and an adjustment is made, the problem is no longer a problem.… Continue reading Here

Make Your Toxic Relationship Healthy

Healthy Relationship

toxic-relationship

This article was originally published on August 30, 2016, and has been updated.

Having a toxic relationship isn’t as uncommon as you think.

Love is a dance of connection and disconnection. Some of us need more connection, others need independence.

What if I told you there were only two roads to making a toxic relationship healthier?… Continue reading Here