The Attachment Style Assessment

The way we attach to our romantic partner influences how we give and experience love in our relationship. The more you’re able to understand your attachment style and how it impacts your relationships, the better you’ll be equipped to find and/or cultivate a secure relationship.

What is Your Attachment Style?
The questionnaire below will help you assess your attachment style. Please pick the statement that best describes you.
How comfortable are you sharing intimate thoughts and feelings with your partner?*
- I am uncomfortable sharing intimate thoughts and feelings with my partner
- I am very comfortable when my partner and I share all of our feelings, thoughts, and interest. Almost like we are merged.
- I am comfortable sharing intimate thoughts and feelings with my partner
How comfortable are you with your partner depending on you and you on them?*
- I often feel as thought I am giving and giving and not getting anything back. You can never really depend on anyone.
- I am comfortable depending on my partner and having my partner depend on me
- I take pride in being independent and I am uncomfortable with my partner depending on me
How much independence and closeness do you prefer in your relationships?*
- I'm most relaxed when I'm around other people
- I'm equally relaxed when I'm with my partner and when I'm alone
- My independence is more important to me than my relationships
How do you feel about affection?*
- My partners often want to be more intimate than I feel comfortable being
- I find it easy to be affectionate with my partner
- I love being affectionate and fear my partner doesn't enjoy it as much
How do you feel about expressing needs and feelings?*
- I prefer not to share my innermost feelings or needs with my partner.
- When I show my partner how they feel, I'm afraid they will not feel the same about me
- I have little difficulty expressing my needs and wants to my partner
How do you feel about arguments with your partner?*
- When I argue with my partner, I typically don't question our entire relationship and am comfortable expressing my opinions even if we disagree
- I prefer to avoid arguments and conflicts with my partner. They never help the relationship.
- I want to solve problems and talk it out. Although sometimes I feel like I am walking on eggshells
How do you feel about pursuing interest with and without your partner?*
- I enjoy pursuing interest separate from my partner
- I feel loved by my partner even when we pursue our own interest separately
- I feel inclined to pursue my partner's interest and put mine on hold for the time being
If your partner acts cold or distant, how do you respond?*
- I'll feel indifferent, maybe even relieved
- I wonder what's happening but I know it's probably not about me
- I worry that I've done something wrong
If you become upset what do you do?*
- Sometimes I can calm myself and other times I need someone to talk it out
- I need space to calm myself down
- I have to talk it out with another person in order to calm myself
How well do you take care of yourself and your partner?*
- I'm low maintenance and prefer a partner who is also low maintenance
- I take care of myself on par with my partner
- I take better care of my partner than I do myself
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The Attachment Style Assessment

What is Your Attachment Style?